manifest destiny, circa 2009.

I can’t imagine my life without you, but the path forward [for us] is so unclear.

I should be packing or campaigning right now. Shoulda woulda coulda I guess. Instead I’m thinking back on my day with a cup of tea and a certain pup at my feet. The house is finally quiet.

My mentor and I met for breakfast this morning and he read me like a book. After leaving the conversation with affirmation and permission to accept that this chapter of my life has come to a close, I walked back into the disaster that yesterday was. That’s dramatic, but it was significant. Significant to me and my story. Significant to our community. The close of this week or the beginning of next week will allow for one more job opportunity to reach its finale. Positive or negative, I have this very strong feeling that it’s for naught. That its not my moment. That there’s another place in the world that is calling to me.

He said – your biggest anguish is rooted in the potential that cannot be reached in your current role. You’re too big for this place.

I don’t know what that means – to be too big for something at the age of 28. Really, I think its that I just don’t fit. That some other opportunity is a better fit. But the anguish…thats real. Very real.

“Its a big bad world full of twists and turns. And people have a way of blinking and missing the moment. The moment that could’ve changed everything.”

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